Unutterable.

I'm late on writing about Charles Williams; he has not proven easy to understand for me in the least. Descent into Hell was a book where I had to read...then re-read...then read again to try to understand what he was saying. I knew he had to be saying something...so I kept digging. And I think - with the help of Dr. Mitchell in class - I have found not what I was looking for (just an explanation of what was going on in this crazy Hill) but the truth of "the fantastic." Truly, the moments where I experienced the message of Williams were amazing, because the deeper the treasure is buried, the more precious it is. What I'm about to write is just one of the jewels I've discovered. I hope I can do justice to it's beauty.

I keep thinking back to the day that we went to the coffee house and first started exposing Williams. I found an interesting piece of information that kept bringing me back to that afternoon...

In 1943, Williams was asked to contribute to a symposium on "What the Cross Means to Me." These are his opening lines:

"Any personal statement on such a subject as the present is bound to be inaccurate. It is almost impossible to state what one in fact believes, because it is almost impossible to hold a belief and to define it at the same time, especially when that belief refers not to the objective fact but to subjective interpretation. A rhetorical adjective will create a false stress; a misplaced adverb confuse an emotion. All that can be hoped is that a not too incorrect approximation may eventually appear..."

After reading Descent, the thought struck me of how little dialogue is in the book. There is so much description, so much inner turmoil, so much wandering that is connected by speech. But it is the journey, the walking throughout the Hill, the "lostness" that owns most of the story. I think it's because Truth is not just simply said for Williams. It is sought, it is experienced, it is found. It is impossible to completely explain, but there is hope for it to be encountered. Few find it in Williams world...but when faced with the Truth and their choice to turn to it and not away, the Paulines are never the same. Descent depicts the encounters incredibly. At first I didn't think I would like it, to be honest. It was so complex, so confusing, so intricate. "What's the point of this? Why not just come out and say it?" But after I closed the cover, my mind went back to the coffee shop...

Dr. Mitchell said, "If I can say it directly, it's not the answer. The Truth exist between us. It's giving and receiving through the Third Person. It's 'bearing witness'. It's testifying to the nature of reality...bound up in mystery with the unutterable."

Williams could not describe the Truth of the Cross in his life. His fallen human attempt to simply say the Truth could result in the lie of our suppositions...but he could write a wandering in which we are forced to walk with the pilgrim, searching for peace, searching for Truth...and we can encounter it. Just don't expect us to describe it afterwards. The only Truth I can speak is the Name of the Third Person...the one who speaks for me "with groanings that cannot be uttered."